One day last week, I was giving someone a compliment and it was very awkward because they had no idea how to receive it! As I was thinking back about the situation a little later, I realized that I am often guilty of making the moment awkward when others start to give me a compliment.
When I started thinking about why I make it so awkward, I think it’s because a lot of times people have provided their compliment with the disclaimer: “Now don’t let this go to your head!” To which I think: “If you really think it’s going to go to my head, then just don’t give it!” If you think about it – that’s like giving an insult before your provide the compliment!
Why do we do this? I think, it’s because most of us are uncomfortable with compliments. And when we give a compliment, we would do well to consider where it is coming from. Is the compliment we are about to give coming from our head or heart? Compliments should come from our heart and if they come from our heart, then most likely they will flow to the heart of the person that we are complimenting!
When I get a compliment, it does not go to my head, it just helps me to be even more thankful to God that He would be willing to use someone as messed up as me to do something worth complimenting!
Let’s start finding, giving and receiving compliments from our hearts and then everyone (the giver and the receiver) will be encouraged!
12 thoughts on “What Happened To Encouragement?”
Good thoughts. I’m so guilty of making the situation awkward by thinking whether or not the person giving the compliment actually means it or is just being nice. Need to just accept it graciously.
Easier said than done!
But you never take credit for my compliments and I understand that but what I say is just what I feel in my heart. You are incredible. Messed up like the rest of us but incredible, amazing, skinny, handsome, the best pastor I have ever had, etc. Should I go on?
You are right – this is a tough area for me, but I am learning and working on it!
BTW – Thank You!
You are so right. Everytime I get a compliment I say something to down grade it. I have heard this from others as I have given compliments and it doesn’t make sense. I now try to accept it as a gift of appreciation and return a thank you. It feels better. Interesting subject.
It is a tough battle and one that I battle with continually!
I kill a compliment by countering it with a flaw. I have been told to just say thank you. I have never noticed a compliment going to your head but I have seen you many time deflect one.
Been there and done that and still trying to learn the hard lesson!
I do the same thing Eugenia…It’s only after I walk away (or in the middle of the night) that I think, “All you had to do was say, ‘Thank You'”…It’s hard!
Most all of us battle with this is some way! The key is acknowledging and trying to do something about it!
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