Category Archives: self improvement

Blogroll, Expectation, Growing, Healing, journey, life, love, peace, positive, self improvement

It Is What It Is!

I am a quote junkie. I love quotes. I collect them, inspect them, disagree with them, embrace them, post them, print them and share them. They encourage me, challenge me, grow me and make me think. One of the quotes that I often say back to myself and other is: “IT IS WHAT IT IS!” Some people love it and some people hate it, but you know what I say? “It is what it is!”

I mean let’s face it, there are some things in this life we can change and there are other things in this life we can’t change. If you can change something and it needs to be changed, then by all means – change it! You have incredible power and can do some amazing things. Do what you can, with what you’ve got and enjoy the journey.

There are some things in this life we can’t change and if we can’t change it, then what’s the point of worrying about it, stressing over it and getting all bent out of shape? If we run into something we can’t change, then it’s time to accept and admit: “It is what it is!”

“I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.” -Philippians 4:11

Stop resisting what is that can’t be changed and instead learn to embrace it. We embrace it, by learning whatever it is here to teach us. So many times, I have wasted my life by getting frustrated and off path by something that I could do absolutely nothing about. I would hate to know how much time I wasted trying to change things that couldn’t be changed.

One of the big lessons I’ve learned from having to face the reality that some things will never change, is that maybe the change needs to take place in me. So in the grand scheme of things here is my simple advice: Change what you can and grow from what you can’t, because at the end of the day: “It Is What It Is!”

Blogroll, Control, emotions, faith, Growing, Healing, judgement, life, mindfulness, Miracles, self help, self improvement, vision

The Only Person You Can Change Is Yourself!

We live in a world that is always trying to shape us into what someone else thinks or says we should be and the real problem with that scenario is that the shape is always changing depending on who happens to be holding to loudest bullhorn at the time.

Most of us have things we would like to change about ourselves and most everyone at some point in their lives can come up with a pretty good list of things they would like to change about others, but if you live your life long enough, you will learn pretty quickly that you cannot change others, no matter how much you think you love them and/or how much you think they love you.

There have been times in my life when I have convinced myself that I could love, encourage, inspire, educate and motivate others to change to be their best self and live their best life, only to eventually come to the realization that the only thing that can change another person is themselves.

If a person does not want to change, then they won’t, it is as simple as that. There is nothing you can do to change someone else, so stop trying to fix everyone else and work on yourself, because we all have enough of our own stuff to deal with.

If you don’t like or love someone the way they are, then that is your problem, even if they are wrong and even if they are cheating or hurting themselves, because their life is their life to decide for themselves. You do not have the right to change anyone else, just like no one else has the right to change you.

Think about it for a moment: God has the ability to change anything and anyone He wants to, but He does not do it. Instead, He gives us time and space to learn and grow through the ups, downs and sideways of life. If and when we are ready to make a change, then God is ready to empower us to do what we need to do, to live the better life we were created for.

“Put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, 23 and be renewed in the spirit of your minds, 24 and put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.” -Ephesians 4:22-24

Stop blaming others and quit getting caught up in the delusion that you can fix others. If you are honest with yourself, you have to admit what a hard time you have fixing yourself. In fact, take your eyes off of others and give your life and living a hard and honest look. Determine what you need to change, decide what you can do about it and get to work.

It is true that we can’t change anyone else, but we can change ourselves and the change in our lives can serve as motivation for others to think about changing themselves too…

Blogroll, journey, life, Mystery, Life,, personal growth, positive, purpose, self improvement, Spititual Development, vision

Victim Or Victor?

I have had some very unfair things happen to me in the living of this life and as much as I hate to admit it, I have been a part of some very unfair things in the lives of others. If we are honest with ourselves and one another, then this is true for all of God’s children.

Live life long enough and pay close enough attention and you will learn that life is about choices and choices have consequences. One of the biggest choices we make that determines in a great way the kind of life we are going to live is the choice between being a victim or a victor.

For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. -Romans 8:15

I’ve noticed something about victims that go on to live a life worth living, they almost never think of themselves as the victim. They know who they are and what they have been through, but they also at some point realize their personal power in making a choice and choose to be a victor over being a victim.

I’m not saying that nothing has ever happened to you or that something is never going to happen to you. I am not saying that you have not been or never will be a victim. The reality is that most of us have been there is some shape or size and we will be there again, but we do have a choice about staying there or growing on.

Most of us decide almost everyday to be a victim or a victor. Someone pulls out in front of us, slams on the breaks and makes us spill our venti mocha coffee – we decide to be a victim or a victor. Someone tells an untruth about us and we get misjudged, criticized and some times lose friendships, but still have to decide if we are going to be a victim or a victor.

A victim stays a victim, unless and until they decide to take their power back and exercise the control that God gave them to live the life of blessing they were created for. It is very easy to play the blame game, but the problem with the blame game is that it rarely ever changes anything for the better.

It’s easy to see all that is wrong, unfair and messed up in our life and get stuck in that place. It is easy to get so preoccupied with ourselves that we forget that for everyone life sucks at some point. The bottom line is this: If you don’t like where you are in this life, if you don’t like your situation and circumstances, then odds are that your life is not going to fix itself.

We need to look to God for guidance, direction and supernatural insight about what to do. We need to pray and ask God for His help and then we have to get busy doing our part to make sure that we are changing and growing , if we expect our life to change and grow.

There is nothing wrong with being a victim, but we have to make sure that we don’t stay a victim, because then we would miss our on the victory that we were created for.