Gary Chapman tells us that the second love language of “The Five Love Languages” is QUALITY TIME!  We need to realize and understand that each of us have a set amount of time.  The fact is:  we all get twenty four hours a day!  What are you doing with your twenty four?  We need to start thinking of time as something that we INVEST!  Realize it or not, we are investing our time into something or someone every day!  We need to make sure that this investment of time is counting, having an impact and making a difference!

Here are just a few of the questions that we must answer, if we are going to be wise investors of our time:  What are who is getting your attention?  What is your life focused on?  What brings real meaning, fulfillment an happiness to your life?  What activities do you participate in that really matter and make a difference?  Quality time is undivided time!  When we invest quality time with those that we love – we make sure that they have our full and undivided attention.  Our attention is on them and their needs.  Our focus is on what they want to do.  Our meaning comes from bringing them pleasure.  Our activity is not that big of a deal – just make sure that it is something that the other person wants to do or be involved in!  (Remember:  This is about them, not you!)

Here are just a few ideas to Make Your Time Count:

Meaningful Conversation – We need to get back to talking, really talking and getting to know one another through conversation.  Next time you are spending some quality time with someone that you love – take time during the conversation to share (give and receive) experiences that have made a difference in your day.  Share thoughts that build up and add value to the person you are sharing with and share the desires of your life – what you would like to see, do and experience.  Don’t interrupt the other person when they are sharing, practice really listening and remember it’s not about you providing a solution, your goal is understanding!

Maintain eye contact!  (The people that we love have amazing eyes – enjoy them!)  Don’t listen and do something else at the same time, even if you can!  (This is about quality, undivided time and attention!)  Listen for feelings!  (Most people camouflage how they feel with the language that they speak – learn to listen to and through the words and you can really get to know those that you love!)  Observe body language!  (It’s amazing how much we speak without saying a word at all!)

The bottom line:  It’s all about just being together and enjoying each other!  Take some time to make your time count today! 

Today – Words Of Affirmation!

Gary Chapman wrote a classic when he wrote “The Five Love Languages!”  It is one of the most read and best advice books on making relationships work that I have ever read!  I think that every person should read this book and learn what their personal love language is and start looking to discover the love languages of the people that God has put around them for relationship!  We all have a love language – that is – we all have a way that love is best expessed to us and experienced by us!  According to Dr. Chapman there are five love languages and I want to spend a few moments encouraging you to love those around you this week with all five!

The first love language is called “WORDS OF AFFIRMATION!”  We communicate our love to others with words of affirmation by seeking to verbally build the person up rather than tearing them down!  This is a tough one now a days, because the world we live in is often negative, pessemistic and destructive.  Take some time today to make a list of some of your most important relationships!  With that list in mind – come up with some creative ways to communicate your love for these people by using positive words of affirmation that build up and encourage.  Think about what you like and appreciate about these people.  Ask youself:  “What and who do I often take for granted?  Make some calls, go out for some lunches, write some notes and make some visits with the purpose of using your words to build up those very special people that God has put around you!

-Are you where you want to be and are you doing what you believe God created you to do in life?

-Have you taken time to seriously pray and reflect on your goals and what they need to be?

-When will you take the time to write down your goals for clarity and accountability?

-What measurable action have you taken that moves you away from where you are and toward the goals God has given you?

Each one of us have a definition of success.  A picture of what we think success looks like and feels like.  The problem with most of our definitions, is that we have borrowed them from someone else, they are not really our own!  We need to take some time to think about what it means for us to be happy, fulfilled and successful!  What does it mean for you?  What does it look like?  What does it feel like?  Take a few moments to fill in the following statements:

*I experience fulfillment, happiness and success in my life when…

*I experience fulfillment, happiness and success in my family when…

*I experience fulfillment, happiness and success in my job or ministry when…

Success and failure are not accidents, they are consequences!  When you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!  When you take the time to put together a plan for your life and work that plan, you will experience some success!  God has given us all that we need -what we do with it – is our choice and will determine our judgment!